Oct 11, 2009
To Do It Or Not
I did not know how this happened. How could I have allowed this to happen, of all people, to myself? My mouth dry, sweat dewing my brow, I looked up towards the high cathedral ceiling and tried to make sense out of the haphazard stained glass window panes just as I attempted to make sense of my mental commotion.
Some may feel like they just want to escape when they have the chance but when they think about the hearts they will break, they quickly snap back into reality. They will also wonder why those who took charge of everything since day was still has the energy to go even more than ever than ever.
Exhaling a mournful sigh, I earned a look from the priest and a teasing poke (ouch!) from the best man, my brother. Even without turning around, I could see his grin. “Wait till it is your turn,” I muttered to myself.
He was not anti to this sacred custom, neither was he not in love with his bride to be which means his nuptials was not at all arranged. However, this was not what he and his fiance agreed on earlier. They wanted to delay their nuptial so that they won’t be tied down in the contract of marriage. It was his mother who demanded that they get married as soon as possible before it was too late.
Until he got married and have kids of his own; his mom won’t stop pestering him. Other than wanting to see his mother happy, he just wanted her to stop pestering him.
I knew it was too late to back out. Everything in the past few months was arranged down to the last excruciating detail, all in a bewildering whirlwind presided over by our indomitable matriarch. The wedding themes at the church and at the lavish banquet tonight were major headaches – especially the exasperating photo-taking sessions where we pasted perpetual smiles. Later we required WEEKS of shopping for wedding supplies such as the wines, the menus, the decorations, the flowers, the ribbons, the bridal car. the list went on and on. Not to mention the cake! My parents and in-laws actually devoted half an hour (imagine that!) just to choose from the endless arrays of wedding cake toppers. Why on earth would people need cakes for wedding I could never fathom the reason. And if they do, which of the guests would actually admire the cake toppers?
It is often argued that there should be less fuss over preparing such detail matter into the ceremony. No one would give a hoot if the cake top was adorned with little figurines of bride and groom or doves. These things mean nothing after the cake is consumed. Although this is true, imagine the opposite, a topless cake, this will get the guest wondering why.
The man could no longer argue with his mother.
The most outrageous thing he figured was the bill for the bridal fashion and jewelry. The bill alone was enough to choke him. What on earth was it that his fiance ordered from the bridal shop? He figured she must have bought two seasons wardrobe from there.
“Trump, tum, ta, ta ” I was jarred out of my wild imaginings as the organ pealed out the dreaded song – “Here comes .”
She stood at the sunlit door of the church. Everything (even the sky-high bill!) fled my mind as she walked down the aisle, step by step, towards me. My heart beat faster and faster, it felt as though it was going to explode.
A man is usually awed by the beauty of his bride. Only at that moment do they realize why the real reason why they had agreed to the whole thing.
The man saw that the woman he was about to marry was calm moreover her eyes told him everything. She was confident that he was the one for her and she was going to share her life with no other. He quickly understood the whole thing then. It was all on him now. | The bride’s eyes seemed to tell her man everything that he needed to know. He was going to face it now, knowing that the woman who was walking towards him placed her life in his hands. Nothing could resolve his doubts any better than this.
I held out my hand. She took it. My fingers closed around hers. This was it – our choice, our commitment.
As they turned to the priest, he secretly made a promise that he would never let her down. Although they may have their bad days, this would not shake him. This is because he now knows that the most important thing for them is to keep together and try to raise a family.
I could not believe my good fortune. I loved her, and she loved me, and that was all that mattered.
The words in my heart came clear and confident, “I do.
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